I am starting to get worried. Not about the action, obviously! The video war is going according to plan. I have a fairly good idea, now, of where the bloody pirate was, which only leaves one variable in this Schrödinger equation for me to identify.
No, I am worried about Isis. She hasn’t said anything for a while and that is not normal. She likes to tease, yes, but she also always has a reason. It’s always because she has a point to make. And sooner or later, that point, she puts it in front of you.
I know her, you see. You cannot… Hell, I can as well say it… You cannot love somebody without knowing them. Not really anyway. Not so that it’s worth something. Not in my book. Normally, she would have say something a long time ago. To string me further along, but also to reassure me.
But she hasn’t said a thing, and now I am worried.
These are strange impressions. There are things that should be here but are missing. There are also other things, that should be but have never been here. Things I should know, but don’t. Things I need to know to make sense of this situation. Things I yearn to know. But somehow, in all my life, I could never be bothered to actually learn them?
I think, I think all my life I have been a lot stupider than I am now. And I also have the nagging suspicion Emile used to be a lot brighter…
It’s called solipsism, you see. The nagging suspicion that you are all alone in the Universe, the only actual, real, thing in the world, and that everything else is a product of you imagination. I am afraid that, with all her talks of freedom and killing, this is where Isis is heading for, and I am afraid also that she is going there too fast for me to follow.